Transitions №3
Author: Tatiana Grauz
Translated by Ainsley Morse
***
in a woman’s face – a freshwater lake
sunset time
she looks around glances
at the train schedule
and the circles ringing further and further
across the lake water
***
my father
left my mother’s house once
I left my father’s house
my mother sleeps beneath rosehips
my father’s mother fell asleep in the forest
andtheyfellasleeplefttheysleepbeneathrosehipsbythefencebytheforest
and only in a hushed voice
fell asleep
left
sleep
***
in a photograph lit by the light of April
the 4th in — oh God knows what year
I haven’t cared about numbers for ages now
even the electricity meter
gets checked by my neighbor Evgenia Valerianovna
a few years ago she got a shunt put in
her deep-warm-heart
sometimes the scar slips out from under her nice blue blouse
athinwhitishseam
she smiles with the light of an otherworldly field
“I won’t be a burden to you, Tanya”
while behind her back – a photograph of my mother with a book in the garden
and now this rain looks like lasting
quiet souls beating down in drops
***
this winter chilled my heart, mama,
and burned my eyes
with its white like death white snow
so as not to cry – I sought summer: that-summer-of-ours
and kept finding your name
in the book of obituaries
TIMID GRATITUDE
(death too makes order)
birds’ migrations
and dahlias in clumps of dry earth
and the scent of incense mixed with sagebrush
and 5–6 or 20 people by a dark pit
where only ants scurry about
and women
(somewhere off in the distance)
are preparing food for the wake
but tomorrow – tomorrow – like autumn mist
unexpected gratitude begins twinkling
delineating a circle (a hidden contour) in which we are alive
OVER LAST YEAR’S GRASS
in a magnifying glass – it’s Palm Sunday
children are setting last year’s grass on fire
standing over it like frozen clouds
and the name of the movie theater congealed in scarlet Cyrillic
р о д и н а – the motherland
over the fresh lawn where once were graves
over the necrotic grass in the cardiogram of paths
in the gray air an agitated soul blooms
***
the stones of winter slowly sprouting
and we
are growing slowly together with them